(with real-life examples and a touch of humor, because otherwise there's no surviving it)...

HR has a strange superpower: people who can't tell onboarding from a performance review, or a KPI from "just set me a goal for the year," confidently hold forth about our work.

HR is a profession where you are considered, all at once:

  • too soft ("well, you're the people person"),
  • too harsh ("why aren't you on our side?"),
  • too useless ("what is it you even do?"),
  • too powerful ("better not to pick a fight with HR").

And while you calmly build the system of hiring, onboarding, motivation, management practices and culture, a parallel reality lives all around you, where HR is the magic button "make it normal."

Let me unpack this. And yes - with examples that sound like a joke but that, unfortunately, were usually said out loud.

1) "HR is about people, so you're obliged to be on the employees' side"

What this means translated from human: "Please be, simultaneously, the union, the mother, the lawyer and the personal psychotherapist of the sales department."

Real situations:

Employee: "I don't want to do the manager's tasks, he's toxic." The expectation: HR goes and "switches off the toxicity" with a button on the back of the manager's head.

Manager: "I've got a toxic employee, sort it out." The expectation: HR takes the employee away, fixes them and returns them "good as new, no bugs."

What actually happens: HR is not a "side." HR is balance and system.

If HR turns into the advocate of only one side, it stops being HR and becomes either an activist or the support staff of power. Both end badly.

A joke, but almost true: HR is not "about people." HR is about people in business - that is, about people under conditions of constraints, money, deadlines and consequences. Nothing personal, but all of it very personal.

2) "HR solves all problems with people"

This is a legend on the level of "if your Wi-Fi isn't working, call the accountant."

Real situations:

"We have turnover. HR is doing a bad job." And when you start asking about salaries, the management style, the workload, the chaos in the processes, it turns out that turnover is "suddenly" not an HR problem but a management strategy of "let the strongest survive."

"People aren't motivated. Create motivation." And you stand there thinking: which kind exactly? The motivation to live? To work? To endure?

"The team is burning out. Run a team building." A team building in a situation where people have been sitting in overload for months is like sticking a plaster on a broken chair and asking it to "hold on more positively."

What HR can actually do:

  • diagnose,
  • highlight,
  • propose solutions,
  • build processes,
  • train the managers.

But HR cannot manage in the manager's place. If a manager doesn't talk to the team, doesn't set tasks, doesn't give feedback, HR is not obliged to be their translator from the language of "silence" into the language of "management."

3) "HR must always be kind"

The favorite corporate fairy tale. It usually sounds like this: "Well, you're HR, you know how to do it gently."

Translation: "Please tell the unpleasant truth in a way that's unpleasant for no one."

Real situations:

The company wants to cut the budget but doesn't want to tell people honestly. The request to HR: "Frame the communication so that people are glad about the optimization."

Manager: "Tell the employee they have a problem with their results, but in a way that makes them feel inspired." It's like asking a doctor to deliver a diagnosis "non-alarmingly, with a smile and, ideally, motivationally."

What actually happens:

A mature HR is not "kind." It is precise. Because real empathy is not "softening." It is not lying and not humiliating at the same time.

4) "HR is something auxiliary, a service function"

I love the phrase "HR is a service." Especially when it's said by someone who sincerely believes a service means "fetch/carry," and not "a system that allows the business not to fall apart."

Real situations:

"Why do we need an HR strategy? We just need to find people." Six months later: "Why are people leaving?" Twelve months later: "Why can't our managers cope?" Eighteen months later: "Why is our culture like a train station?"

"We don't need HR. We're a family company." This usually means: "Our rules are at the level of emotions, and if you start formalizing them, it'll be uncomfortable for us."

What actually happens:

HR is not "parties and gifts." HR is the management of risks, of productivity, of predictability.

If a company grows fast while the HR function stays at the level of "hire and process the paperwork," the company starts coming apart at the seams where the owner least expects it: in management, culture, discipline, turnover, internal conflicts.

5) "People go into HR when they're no good at business and numbers"

This myth lives especially long because it's convenient. It lets you treat HR as a "humanities zone," where you can speak beautifully but not necessarily effectively.

Real situations:

"We want a bonus system. Make it, you're HR after all." When HR asks questions about margin, metrics, budget, cost structure and manageability, they look at it as if it had suddenly started speaking Japanese.

"Make KPIs." And then: "What KPIs? Well, come up with them." As if KPIs were a set of pretty words and not managerial mathematics and accountability.

What actually happens:

A good HR today is obliged to understand:

  • the economics of roles,
  • the cost of hiring mistakes,
  • the impact of turnover on profit,
  • productivity,
  • and how motivation turns into behavior.

Otherwise it turns into an "organizer of good moods." And that is a separate, honest profession - just not HR.

6) "HR can tweak the culture in a quarter"

It's usually phrased like this: "Build us a culture of engagement." It sounds roughly like: "Arrange us nice weather for the weekend."

Real situations:

The company lives for years in the mode of "everything's urgent," "mistake = punishment," "initiative = risk." Then the request comes: "We want a culture of trust and responsibility." And preferably without changing the management style.

The manager punishes bad news. Then asks: "Why won't anyone tell me the truth?"

What actually happens:

Culture is what happens:

  • when a mistake has been made,
  • when bad news has come,
  • when an employee has said "no,"
  • when a decision must be made in a crisis.

If in these situations the system chooses fear and pressure, no presentation about values will cancel that out.

7) "HR is the one who's supposed to "motivate" people"

This is my personal favorite, because it sounds like magic.

Real situations:

"People don't want to work, come up with some motivation." Meanwhile the salary is below market, the workload above market, the manager communicates in the style of "I said so - do it," and the processes are chaotic.

"We don't have time for one-to-ones. Let HR have the talk." That is, management saves on managing, and HR is supposed to compensate for it with conversations.

What actually happens:

Motivation is not created by the HR department as a product. Motivation arises at the intersection of:

  • the meaning of the tasks,
  • fairness,
  • manageability,
  • normal conditions,
  • and respectful management.

HR can help assemble the system. But it cannot make a person want to, if everything around is arranged so that all you want is to survive and leave.

"HR = recruiting"

In our market this is especially widespread: many still think HR is "the one who posts job openings."

Real situations:

"We have HR. They handle recruiting." Then it turns out there's no onboarding, no assessment, no development, no management practices, no pay system, no org structure - but there is recruiting.

It's like saying: "We have medicine: we have a first-aid kit."

What actually happens:

Recruiting is an important part, but it doesn't replace the HR function. On the contrary: the quality of recruiting depends on how well everything else is built. Because strong candidates assess not the vacancy but the company as a whole, and they leave not a vacancy but a reality.

So what do you do with all this?

The most common mistake companies make is arguing with the "legends" head-on. It's pointless.

Something else works: showing cause-and-effect relationships.

Want less turnover? Let's look at management, workload, fairness, development and pay - not at "why are people like this."

Want initiative? Let's examine what happens to those who made a mistake.

Want engagement? Let's look at trust, predictability and the quality of management - not at posters.

And here the grown-up truth appears: HR is not a "soft function." HR is the function that helps the business stay manageable and not destroy people along the way.

And humor… humor is needed so you don't go insane when on Friday at 5:30 p.m. someone writes to you: "Urgent, needed yesterday: find us a director, but one who's cheap, brilliant and makes no mistakes. And preferably one who loves chaos."